Dating Russian Girls: The Ultimate Guide to Melting the Ice Queen

Russian girls are not only some of the most beautiful women in the world, but they also possess a personality unlike any other. You probably know that already, but what about dating a Russian girl?

They will captivate you with their charm and make you feel like no one else could possibly do. But I want to be real in this article, and I’ll start by saying that dating a woman from Russia is not like dating a woman from the West. It is the mountaintop of the dating world – challenging to climb, but the view from the top is unbeatable.

Now, if you want to make sure you know how to climb that mountain and make a Russian woman yours, you’re in luck! This article teaches you everything you should know about these amazing ladies, their dating style, how to meet them, and what to expect from a relationship with one.

IMPORTANT: Before we jump in, I want to address the elephant in the room. We’re currently living in a world divided by politics and conflict, but I don’t want that to be mirrored in today’s article (or your comments).

Most modern Russian women are caught in the middle of history (read more about the Russian culture here), but they’re just looking for love, stability, and a future, regardless of what’s on the news. After all, love is human, not political – and we’re here to talk about the former only. Let’s jump in!

The Traditional Russian Girl Looks

When it comes to looks, Russian women are well-known beauties, but you should know that it’s not just great genetics responsible for this.

They also treat beauty as discipline: they eat healthily, they exercise, and they take good care of their skin to start with, then they always make sure that their make-up is flawless, their hair is freshly made and their clothes are highlighting their best features.

This also means that the “natural look” in Russia is very different from the Western idea of throwing on sweatpants and a messy bun. A Russian woman’s “casual” is often an American woman’s “formal” or even more. These ladies bring their A game at all times, no matter the occasion.

They take immense pride in their presentation, up to the point that some would call them overdressed (I will never complain, though).

Walk down the street in any major Russian city in January, and you will see women navigating icy sidewalks in stilettos, looking like they just stepped off a runway.

They do this for themselves as much as they do for the eyes that analyze them – and it’s easy to recognize a Russian woman anywhere in the world for this reason alone.

They also love having long hair, often keeping it well-maintained and glossy. It is a symbol of their femininity, and they know it drives men wild.

One of the most amazing things about these women is how tall they are. If you are a shorter guy, you will still find a Russian girl who will fit right in with your height, but be prepared for her to wear heels that might make her tower over you. She won’t apologize for it, and neither should you.

They are also incredibly slender. They have great curves, but they are very thin otherwise, so it’s no surprise that so many supermodels and actresses have Russian roots.

But all this implies a certain standard for you, too. You don’t need to be a model, but you cannot look like a slob next to a woman who spent hours getting ready.

Russian Girls: Personality Traits

Russian girls are some of the most open women when it comes to relationships, but you have to understand the “Russian Peach” concept.

In the West, people are usually soft on the outside (smiling at strangers, always ready for small talk), but hard on the inside. Russians are peaches: hard on the outside (or at least so they seem), but soft on the inside.

At first glance, she might seem cold, like fellow Ukrainian women, but also like the Nordic ones, especially women from Denmark.

This means that it’s extremely unlikely for her to smile at you on the street if you’re a complete stranger. That’s how it is all over Eastern Europe and the Balkans – but it’s just a small price to pay (and they do make up for it in other areas).

Plus, once you break through that initial icy layer, they don’t like hiding their emotions, which is why they are always so touchy-feely! You will constantly be wrapped in hugs and kisses.

Don’t let this scare you though – these girls aren’t clingy! They just truly enjoy being close to their significant other. Once she decides you are her man, her loyalty is absolute. She will defend you to the death against outsiders, even if she was yelling at you five minutes prior.

Speaking of yelling, they have a fiery personality that you will adore from the moment you meet them. She is probably stubborn, and she can get feisty, but those are some of the traits that make her so attractive. It shows she cares.

A Russian woman who is indifferent to you is a woman who doesn’t love you. If she is arguing with you, it means she actually cares, as counter-intuitive as this might sound.

They also like to play hard to get – especially in the early stages of the dating game. In dating psychology, this is often called a “Shit Test.” She might act unimpressed, challenge your opinions, or change plans last minute.

But all these are just some kinds of tests she has, checking to see if you are strong enough to handle her. If you crumble, apologize profusely or get overly upset, you fail. If you laugh it off and hold your ground with a smile, you pass. It’s that easy!

Remember that many men in Russia are very masculine – the ultimate alpha type – with a generally traditional view of relationships. They are also known to love their alcohol, and men can be real pigs when drunk, so understand her initial reluctance.

But you do get major bonus points if you prove to be the gentleman with a backbone. If you know how to treat her right, if you are attentive, and if you really show that she is special to you, then she will be yours in no time.

Russian girls appreciate warmth and chivalry, and as a Westerner, you might also have a slight advantage, as you’ll be considered exotic. Now, this doesn’t always work, because some are, unfortunately, not interested at all in foreigners – but as long as she’s talking to you or showing at least some interest, she’s not in that category.

All in all, we can say that the Russian woman is considered the “perfect woman” – beautiful and smart, with traditional values – but still open-minded enough to be considered moder.

When you get her going – and it really doesn’t require a ton of effort if you are a genuinely nice guy, and if you keep your “bad boy” urges in check – she will absolutely blow you away with her passion! After all, they are some of the most fun, exciting women that any man can meet. They are gorgeous, sweet, kind-hearted… truly perfect.

The Alcohol Reality Check

You’re probably aware of this stereotype: Russian women love to drink and party like there’s not tomorrow. I want to address it in particular, because it’s part of what many men promote, suggesting that exactly because of this, it’s easier to score.

While it is true that some girls from Russia love to drink and might even handle their liquor better than you do, the vast majority only drinks socially – if at all.

Don’t assume, just because she’s Russian, that she will get wasted and go home with you if you pay for her drinks. Even those who do enjoy a drink know they would rarely do that and they usually know when to stop – right before reaching the “out of control” spot.

But don’t just bring the vodka bottle, certain that she drinks. Most of the Russian women I know are, in reality, far from what you could consider a heavy drinker.

Chivalry and Etiquette

As we saw already, she expects you to be a gentleman, but in Russia, this might mean a bit more than you think.

First, another smaller elephant in the room: money and paying for dates. If you invite a Russian girl on a date, you pay. End of story.

There is no “going Dutch,” no splitting the bill, and no “I’ll get this one, you get the next one.” If you suggest splitting the bill, there will not be a second date. She will look at you with confusion and disdain.

In her eyes, if you cannot afford a dinner, how can you afford a family? And this doesn’t mean that she’s a gold-digger or that she’s only in for the money – it’s just the way things are here, and how things are in the region, like women from Kazakhstan.

Second, you must master the “Coat Check.” In Russia, when you enter a restaurant or theater, you must check your coats. It is considered incredibly rude to bring your outerwear to the table.

As a man, you must help her take her coat off before you take off yours. When leaving, you put your coat on first, and then you hold her coat for her to slip into.

And finally, if you want to win her heart, you will have to buy her flowers – from the first date to your 100th, flowers are always appreciated.

But here is a tip that will save your life: Always buy an odd number of flowers! One, three, five, or one hundred and one.

In Russian culture, even numbers (two, four, six) are strictly reserved for funerals. If you show up to a date with a dozen red roses, you are effectively wishing death upon her. It is a superstitious culture, so try not to make this mistake (the same goes for the rest of Eastern Europe – Romanian girls, those from Moldova, and all the surrounding ones have similar beliefs).

Russian Girls: Family Matters

Even though most ladies in Russia are modern and open-minded, do not forget that family plays a massive role in their lives. Expect them to be very caring and kind-hearted towards their parents and siblings. In the West, you might see your parents a few times a year; in Russia, she likely talks to her mother every single day.

Speaking of which, they care a lot about what their mother tells them. When you are finally introduced to the family, treat it like a job interview where the salary is eternal happiness.

Do your best to leave a solid impression. Dress well, bring flowers for the mother (remember: odd numbers!), and perhaps a bottle of good alcohol for the father.

While it is unlikely she will dump you just because her mother says so, it is a huge advantage to be accepted by her family. This will make everything easier in the long term, and it keeps unnecessary drama out of the relationship. The mother is the gatekeeper. If mom likes you, you are in.

Be prepared for the hospitality. If you visit her home, you will be fed. Refusing food in a Russian household is akin to a slap in the face. Even if you aren’t hungry, eat at least a bit, but strive to eat everything they offer you (and it will be A LOT!) At least the food is delicious, and the company is even better!

Do expect all the Babushkas (grandmothers) around her to interfere as well. They might constantly try to get her back with some ex-boyfriend or make you feel like less of a man because you don’t know how to fix a carburetor in the snow.

This is where the “modern woman” part kicks in: Russian girls are not afraid to tell their parents exactly what they think, and they will remind them that you are their choice.

Don’t worry too much about skepticism, though – it is actually more common for her family to like her foreign boyfriend than not. Despite the current geopolitical tensions we touched on earlier, many Russian parents view Western men as a “safe bet.” They see you as someone who is likely more sober, more stable, and less aggressive than the local options they are used to.

Russian Girls: What They Don’t Want

There is a fine line you need to walk here, as it is the case with any relationship. If you are too much of a “macho man” (loud, aggressive, and over-compensating) you will definitely scare them off. They have enough of that at home.

Russian women, instead, appreciate men who are kind and caring, even if they are strong and opinionated.

This means that you should not confuse “kind” with “weak.” This is the most common mistake Western men make. They try so hard to be the “Nice Guy” that they become indecisive. A Russian woman hates the question: “I don’t know, honey, what do you want to do for dinner?”

She wants a leader, but a kind one. She wants you to say: “Put on that black dress; I made reservations at 7:00 PM.” That is not being controlling (and, of course, she DOES have a say in this), but it is what she expects from you – taking a bit of the mental load off her shoulders. She wants to relax in her feminine energy, which she can only do if you are resting firmly in your masculine energy.

They also hate men who are cheap. As we discussed regarding the bill, trying to get the most for the least amount of money is a major turn-off.

In a country where history has been turbulent, financial generosity signals safety. If you are stingy with a $50 dinner check, she assumes you will be stingy with your love and protection when times get tough.

Most importantly, make sure that you treat her right. As long as you are caring and listen to her, as long as you appreciate her and protect her (without being an aggressive brute), and as long as you are genuinely a gentleman, you will have no problems making her love you.

Conclusion

The vast majority of girls in Russia are genuine, caring, and amazing women. Don’t let the bad seeds – which can be found in any country – change your opinion about them. They are the exceptions, not the majority.

At the same time, despite the stereotypes you probably know, dating a Russian woman is not for the lazy. It requires effort: you have to dress better, act sharper, and lead with confidence, plus navigate various cultural differences (always bringing flowers, getting on with her mother and so on). But the return on investment is higher than anything else you will find in the dating market.

Being loved by a Russian woman is one of the best things that can happen to you. She will push you to be a better man, she will keep your home full of warmth, and she will stand back-to-back with you against the world.

Hopefully, this guide managed to paint a clear picture of what Russian girls are actually like. You now have the toolkit to approach them with confidence, so, iron your shirt, buy an odd number of roses, and go find her! She is waiting for a man who is up to the challenge.

Don’t forget to share your thoughts in the comments section below. Do you have experience dating in Russia? We would love to hear your “war” stories!